My dear lovely Brain, You Need Some Time Off, and so DO I

Once I have done it (for 2 days) I reprogrammed my self into hope. My brain didn’t respond very well though.
How cool it would be if we could control our brains for every thing, if we had a control panel when we close our eyes, so we just click with our sight over the wanted option like " on hope", on" temporary numb", on" lie on your self and believe the lie" or on "lalalalalala…siiiiiinging in the rain, just singing in the rain, what a beautiful day what a .." moods?
You should be extremely good to be able to lie to yourself.
I know people who do it, who lie on themselves and then they believe the lie, they seem so happy, they see the word in pinky eyes, birds all around cheering and singing lullabies to laughing babies, nice clever people every where, talking rabbits and singing cows, cool air even when it is as hot as the Moroccan desert's 60 degrees that we learned about in the elementary school.. And above all, even if they were the biggest screwed up jerks in the world, they see themselves as the best successful, moralistic people ever!

I envy them, I mean … I really wish I can be a jerk like them, and stop cursing and hating every thing I do, nothing is enough to me, I am turning into mom … nothing is ever good enough.

I … its so freaking shit, I want to control my brain but my brain is like a crazy asshole, running around, laughing at me all the time, if I asked it to love, it will hate and if I asked it to sleep it will stay up all night, it put the "in your face" mood all the day, it put its tongue out laughing and dripping at my "hopes", calling me nuts all the time, screaming at my rationalism complexes all the time, I think my brain needs a break.
I love you my brain, you made lots of fucked up things in the world senseless to me which is saving my heart beats keeping them going, to learn that "fucked up world" is not sensible… which kept my hopes alive.
You were able to stop me crying out lewdly in several occasions, spared me embarrassment.
You were able to control my rage when meeting stupid arrogant people saying the most stupid ugly disgusting inhumane things in the world, spreading blackness and sickness around.
I know you have a good heart, but you need a time off.

Oh my stupid lovely weird brain, why you are forcing me into posting this crazy stupid post….

I want to give my brain a break, buy it some nice sunglasses, pinky rosy Hawaii t-shirt, a big bar of flake chocolate and some maltesers for the journey and send it to Alaska to freeze for a while, any one knows a nice brain travel agent?